Crumbling & Overgrown

Somewhere along my way, I lost touch with my own life...my drives, my goals. Oh, I carried out my work & was mother to my child, but I was going through the motions. I loved the idea of my life, but there was no passion anywhere. I had no drive to do the things I love...My interests lay somewhere behind a deep fog & a miry mush. Life seemed without purpose or meaning, promise or hope...& I had no idea how I got there.
I arose New Year's morning to purposefully seek the Lords' wisdom & Presence. As I settled myself outside, the word whispered to me was, "sloth"...so short & low I could have easily missed it. I looked up every reference & every tense of the word.
Proverbs 19:15 said, "Slothfulness casts one into a deep sleep" & that was exactly what happened to me! I felt the writer of thousands of years ago had been peering into the window of my inner world & realized just how how applicable the Bible remains to this day.
Proverbs 24:30-34 describes "the vineyard of the slothful" as overgrown with tangles & nettles, it's walls crumbling. After gazing upon this scene, Solomon writes in verse 32, "...I considered it well. I looked on it & received instruction. A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest; so your poverty will come like a prowler & your want like an armed man."
I had remained in my comfort zone, following the same paths & patterns...going through the motions in every aspect of my life & not doing much of anything with any intent. Without being aware of what was happening, everything in my worlds started to slip away from me. I began to feel out of control & helpless.
Allowing my morning time with God to slip away had started me a on a journey of decay & I set about to reconnect. The journalling process brought me to my need to be intentional & deliberate in all that I do. I asked God for help & He led me to tiny scriptures buried away. They showed me the cause & the results & that I am not alone.